Kids who try to act cool in early adolescence are more likely to have problems with drugs and alcohol, and have trouble managing friendships as they grow older. And their popularity tends to fade by the time they're 22.
Part of the problem, Allen says, may be that as these cool kids grew older, they felt the need to do increasingly extreme things to get attention. "But their friends, as they get more mature, are less and less impressed by those behaviors," he says.
And many media portrayals of life in high school aren't helping damp down the impression that fast is cool, he adds. "What the media does, I think, is it portrays this fast life in very glamorous terms. [It] sets up an expectation that teens should be acting older."
Of course, this doesn't mean that any kid's fate is set at 13, Allen says. "It is not a life sentence." But teens should be aware that focusing too heavily on appearance and social hierarchies can be unhealthy, he says. And parents can help by encouraging their teens to aim for fulfillment in the long term over short-term popularity."The quiet, not-so-cool kids do well in the long term," Allen says. "I would say I was part of the not-so-cool kids."
http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2014/06/12/321314037/cool-kids-lose-though-it-may-take-a-few-years?ft=1&f=1007
Part of the problem, Allen says, may be that as these cool kids grew older, they felt the need to do increasingly extreme things to get attention. "But their friends, as they get more mature, are less and less impressed by those behaviors," he says.
And many media portrayals of life in high school aren't helping damp down the impression that fast is cool, he adds. "What the media does, I think, is it portrays this fast life in very glamorous terms. [It] sets up an expectation that teens should be acting older."
Of course, this doesn't mean that any kid's fate is set at 13, Allen says. "It is not a life sentence." But teens should be aware that focusing too heavily on appearance and social hierarchies can be unhealthy, he says. And parents can help by encouraging their teens to aim for fulfillment in the long term over short-term popularity."The quiet, not-so-cool kids do well in the long term," Allen says. "I would say I was part of the not-so-cool kids."
http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2014/06/12/321314037/cool-kids-lose-though-it-may-take-a-few-years?ft=1&f=1007
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